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Every couple wants to have a happy and long lasting marriage. However after receiving blessings from family and friends and beginning brightly, conflict and misunderstandings are bound to occur. As a result, they start arguing and fighting. Here is my help for marriage advice that every couple needs in staying together. Marriage is a lifetime commitment of both man and woman in the eyes of the society. That includes their family and friends who attended and became witnesses in their wedding. If they are Christians, that commitment becomes much stronger since they are also making a vow to God in church. Other than, it provides personal and social stability in making them to be more mature and responsible people and producing further generations as in their children. In other words, marriage makes a person complete as a whole. Or at least that is what most people think especially in traditional countries like Asia and Middle East. In the olden days, it is very easy to fulfil that commitment since women tend to be submissive to men since that is what they do. However in the 21st century – unless you are still living in a developing country with villages, women are given an equal or even higher status in societies whereby they can work, earn and prosper with or without help from men. As a result, they tend to develop their own mindsets and values. Now it is very easy for man and woman to live alone for life since they have the freedom and money to do whatever they want without worrying anything. They no longer need someone to share their feelings unless they face real difficulties and are desperate for immediate solutions. Rather it is having someone with them that brings them various problems. Like restricted to only doing certain things. Such as when it comes to spending money, they need to seek permission from their spouses first. They cannot date or go partying with friends like their dating days. Having said that, it is not much different living as a child who has to obey his parents and get their permission in everything he wants to do or have. With that being said, marriage is not just an expression of love and wanting to live with each other forever. Forget all about those fairy tales of living happily ever after because in today’s society, that is not going to happen without the usual ups and downs. Such as being able to handle responsibilities as a loving husband and parent when you have children. I am not saying that marriage is bad. It is good as it enables them to continue their family lineage and learn to be responsible husband and wife, father and mother. But what really happens is the entire process. What you do everyday, how much time you spend with your spouse, what exactly did you communicate and how much you care etc. All these come into play as they can enable or disable your marriage to continue as long as you and your spouse want. However busy you are at work, you need to do all these frequently in order to maintain good relations with your spouse. No one is born perfect. But that does not mean they should not strive for perfection. In order to do that, the couple must acknowledge and accept each other the way they want rather than what one expects the other to be. Unfortunately not everyone – especially those getting married early – understood that. They got the whole concept of love wrong by thinking it is just kissing, hugging, sex and staying together without really showing genuine concern. That is not what love is and that is not what God wants from couples. That is my honest and down-to-earth help for marriage advice to all couples.
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