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A frequent comment made to me when I am successfully participating in a conversation is, “I thought you were partially deaf. How come you seem to hear everything we are saying? " Then they are doubly puzzled when I am shortly thereafter totally confused and not hearing well when the conversation shifts. This is because the topic and content of a conversation play a huge part in the comprehension of speech - of hearing - for all of us. Especially those of us who are hard of hearing. Have you not been in a conversation with someone and they suddenly, mid-stream, out of the blue, for no reason at all, they shift gears and talk about something else totally unrelated to the current discussion? What is your first response? "Huh? What? What ARE you talking about?" Is it because you have a hearing loss? No! It is because much of what you were hearing was based on the topic and content of the conversation. When the conversation topic shifted without any warning, the subsequent verbiage didn't "match" what the brain had been expecting and interpreting. So for a brief time you are at a loss until you know the topic of the new conversation. It can happen so fast you may not even be aware you are doing it. Here is an example of what I mean: It's sort of like trying to understand people with strong foreign accents Imagine you are standing in line at a convenience store and someone from a foreign land with an extremely strong accent comes up to you and starts talking. The accent is so strong you strain hard; eyes squinted, in an effort to understand what this nice person is enthusiastically talking to you about. Suddenly you hear something that sounds like, "Magic Kingdom." With THAT piece of information, you listen some more and, indeed, that is what the person is talking about - their recent visit to Disneyland. Armed with the topic, you are then able to comprehend their words better. A whole lot better. Your brain is chock full of information about Disneyland that fills in the blanks, so to speak, of what you may not clearly understand from this foreign visitor. CONVERSATION CONTENT COUNTS TOO Now, suppose this foreign visitor is chatting on a topic for which you know NOTHING - like nuclear physics. With no prior knowledge stored in your memory to draw upon, the brain cannot help fill the gaps of what you do not comprehend. In that case you probably are going politely explain to the enthusiastic visitor that you are not able to understand them and end the conversation. TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE IMPORTANCE TOPIC AND CONTENT PLAY IN UNDERSTANDING A CONVERSATION How can this knowledge serve those of us who have a hearing impairment or interacting with one with a hearing loss? Make sure the TOPIC of the conversation is understood first and foremost. Hopefully, once the topic is known, there is some knowledge of the content. Knowledge that helps to fill the gaps of what is not fully heard. After 2-3 tries the topic isn't yet understood, write it down in a short sentence. You'll see their eyes light up and relief spread over their face. They can now participate to in the conversation. How much they can participate can depend on how much they already know about the topic. But without at least knowing what the topic is, the chances of participating in any degree is slim. I recall when my father was losing his hearing and needed this type of assistance to understand what mom was saying. But mom just flatly refused to write anything down for dad. She'd just scream the same sentence over and over, louder and louder. Her face would turn red and the veins in her would neck stick out. It was awful. Dad was isolated. Mom was frustrated. There were few conversations between my parents once dad lost his hearing. Contrast that to a wonderful audiologist whose husband is hearing impaired. She told me that when they are out to dinner with friends, she always clues him in when the topic of a conversation has shifted, so he has a better opportunity to stay connected with the party. She'll turn to him and say, "Honey, we are now talking about the movie 'Terminator.'" If he doesn't understand her after a couple tries, she'll jot it down for him to read. He smiles in acknowledgement and the conversation continues...with him. IN CONCLUSION When you capitalize on the topic of conversation and then content, you'll find communication will be much more easily received and achieved. This is true no matter who you are chatting with, but especially if communicating with individuals who are hearing impaired. If you are discussing a topic for which the listener(s) are not familiar, be prepared to slow down and repeat yourself. Not because they have hearing loss, but because they are not familiar with the topic or content of THAT conversation. If the listener is hearing impaired, much more effort will be required to get the information across. But it is worth the effort. Communication is connection. Connection is vital to a person's sense of well-being, esteem and confidence. Be the giver of the gift of connection. You can start by making sure the topic and content of the conversation is known. *** Author: Linnaea Mallette Author Website: Linnaea Mallette Hearing Loss Website/Blog: Hearing Loss Tips
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hearing loss, hearing impaired, communication, hard of hearing,
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