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How to Identify Your Soul Mate Recall that in the previous section, "What Is a Soul Mate?" I defined a soul mate as being a person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity. This may involve similarity, love, romance, friendship, intimacy, sexuality, sexual activity, spirituality, or compatibility and trust. In the context of dating, we naturally want to focus on romantic soul mates, the people with whom we want to be in love and who will reciprocate that love in a special way. How do you know you've found your soul mate? To be honest, you most often don't know right off the bat. But there are some indications that the person just might be that special person. Here are some of them: 1. Unexplained attraction. In some cases, this might be similar to "love at first sight," although "love at first sight" is often just lust at first sight. You have to be careful to differentiate between the two. Soul-mate attraction has deep, subtle roots. In fact, you might not even feel that attraction the first time you meet, at least on a conscious and noticeable level. But you will have a mysterious feeling that you want to be with this person more often and get to know him or her better. 2. Your incompatibilities are not important to you. No two people are a perfect match. Soul mates don't care about the little things. They accept their soul mate for the person they are, blemishes and all. This is not to say that you overlook major differences. If there are major differences that go against your grain, against your morals or ethics, this person is not a soul mate, no matter how much you might think otherwise. We're talking about little things such as squeezing the toothpaste tube in the middle or not liking to dance the polka. 3. Intense "chemistry." There is some kind of nearly magical "rightness" to your being together. This goes along with the attraction mentioned above. The feeling is ineffable; that is, it cannot be described. But you both know that being together is much more happy for both of you than is being apart. 4. You are most comfortable in their presence than you are otherwise. In some respects, being with this person is like being at "home." This is not to say that you pine and yearn for their presence when they are out of sight, but that you feel comfortable and safe with them when you are together. You can spend hours together without saying a word or even touching, and yet you know you are in the right place with the right person at the right time. One thing you need to understand is that a soul-mate relationship is made in heaven, but it is not always heavenly. You will have ups and downs and fights with your soul mate, and that seems to be one of the prerequisites for such a relationship. Soul mates, we are told by many people, are supposed to test one another and teach one another more about compassion and love than is otherwise possible. You might even separate for a while (sometimes forever), but that all goes with the territory. The important part is that a soul mate helps you with your spiritual growth, and you should be thankful for the opportunity. Identifying Your Soulmate
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